When an iconic figure like Toby Keith passes away, the world momentarily pauses in a show of respect. As one of the most influential names in the history of entertainment, Toby Keith is credited with propelling the careers of notable artists such as Taylor Swift, Olivia Rodrigo, and even the unconventional Lucille, a singing spider monkey with the 14th-largest TikTok following globally.
In honor of this, the upcoming Super Bowl on Sunday will extend its duration by three minutes, featuring Oliver Anthony delivering a prayer from Theologians and performing Toby Keith’s beloved song, “I’ll Never Smoke Weed With Willy Again.”
Stadium Superintendent Joe Barron remarked, “It’s a fitting tribute. I’ve shared a joint with Willy. Toby had a point.” While Willy Nelson remained unavailable for comment, Taylor Swift’s attendance at the Super Bowl raises uncertainty about her stance during the National Anthem—whether she will stand or kneel.
Whoopi Goldberg mentioned Megan Rapinoe and Riley Gaines, adding a curious reference to a fifth-place jar of mayo with peculiar eyes. The reporter is unsure of Whoopi’s connection to Toby Keith or her stance on the matter. The Psychoanalogicalist suggests the issue traces back to the closure of mental hospitals during Reagan’s era, leading patients to hoard cash.
Amidst all of this, a lesson emerges: uniting in song about war brings forth a magical freedom cloth, and God’s love for America remains an undeniable fact, not an opinion. In closing, a heartfelt farewell is extended to Toby Keith, with a blessing for his eternal soul.
