WASHINGTON, DC—President Donald Trump stunned the world Tuesday by gerrymandering the United States to annex Canada, forming a supercountry with the largest maple syrup reserves. The Trump-gerrymanders-Canada move reshapes geopolitics.
“I redrew the borders myself,” Trump declared in the Oval Office. “As president, I can do this. Canada’s now our 51st state. It’s a fantastic gerrymander.” For more on U.S. politics, visit Politico.
Critics slammed the decision. “This is a Republican plot to let conservative moose vote GOP,” said House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries. “Trump’s rigging elections with ‘The Great White North’ scheme.” The move sparked heated debate.
Former Canadian Prime Minister, now Governor, Mark Carney mildly objected. “I’m not thrilled, but we’ll go along to avoid fuss, eh?” he said, reflecting Canadian politeness. Learn about international relations at Foreign Affairs.
At press time, Trump warned Mexico’s president of further gerrymandering unless a new trade deal is signed.